Little Kids Instructions on Life

Never trust a dog to watch your food.
Patrick, Age 10
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When you want something expensive, ask your grandparents.
Matthew, Age12
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Never smart off to a teacher whose eyes and ears are twitching.
Andrew, Age 9
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Wear a hat when feeding seagulls.
Rocky, Age 9
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Sleep in your clothes so you'll be dressed in the morning.
Stephanie, Age 8
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Never try to hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
Rosemary, Age 7
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Don't flush the john when your dad's in the shower.
Lamar, Age 10
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Never ask for anything that costs more than five dollars when your
parents are doing taxes.
Carrol, Age 9
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Never bug a pregnant mom.
Nicholas, Age 11
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Don't ever be too full for dessert.
Kelly, Age 10
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When your dad is mad and asks you, "Do I look stupid?" don't answer him.
Heather, Age 16
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Never tell your mom her diet's not working.
Michael, Age 14
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Don't pick on your sister when she's holding a baseball bat.
Joel, Age12
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When you get a bad grade in school, show it to your mom when she's
on the phone.
Alyesha, Age 13
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Never try to baptize a cat.
Laura, Age 13
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Never do pranks at a police station.
Sam, Age 10
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Beware of cafeteria food when it looks like it's moving.
Rob, Age 10
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Never tell your little brother that you're not going to do what your
mom told you to do.
Hank, Age 12
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Remember you're never too old to hold your father's hand.
Molly, Age 11
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Listen to your brain. It has lots of information.
Chelsey, Age 7
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Stay away from prunes.
Randy, Age 9
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Never dare your little brother to paint the family car.
Phillip, Age 13