Adrian Mole's best quotes: what are your favourites?
The angst-ridden, adorably eccentric adolescent left us with innumerable memorable lines. Here are some classic Mole statements, but what are your favourite Sue Townsend quotes? We will update the list with your suggestions
Now I know I am an intellectual. I saw Malcolm Muggeridge on the television last night, and I understood nearly every word. It all adds up. A bad home, poor diet, not liking punk. I think I will join the library and see what happens.
There's only one thing more boring than listening to other people's dreams, and that's listening to their problems.
I'm not sure how I will vote. Sometimes I think Mrs Thatcher is a nice kind sort of woman. Then the next day I see her on television and she frightens me rigid. She has got eyes like a psychotic killer, but a voice like a gentle person. It is a bit confusing.
My mother is in the hospital grounds smoking a cigarette. She is looking old and haggard. All the debauchery is catching up with her.
I don't know why women are so mad about flowers. Personally, they leave me cold. I prefer trees
[Good Friday] Poor Jesus, it must have been dead awful for him. I wouldn't have the guts to do it myself.
I used to be the sort of boy who had sand kicked in his face, now I'm the sort of boy who watches somebody else have it kicked in their face.
My father was reading Playboy under cover of the candlelight and I was reading Hard Times by my key-ring torch.
I have never seen a dead body or a female nipple. This is what comes from living in a cul de sac.
Glenn has been excluded from school, for calling Tony Blair a twat.
My brother has published a volume of poetry, called Blow Out The Candle. The reviews were ecstatic. I hate him already.
I fear I am losing the battle to mould William's character to my own satisfaction. He's only six, but at his age Mozart was selling out concerts all over Europe.
Now over to you.
rickylee369 suggests:
My skin is dead good. I think it must be a combination of being in love, and Lucozade.
rosiefiore suggests:
Nigel is a punk at weekends. His mother lets him be one providing he wears a string vest under his bondage T-shirt.
LevNikolayevich suggests:
Went to see Hadrian's Wall. Saw it. Came back.
Tom Hamid suggests:
I am an intellectual, but at the same time I am not very clever.
Cobblerjane suggests:
Pandora! / I adore ya! / I implore ye / Don't ignore me.
fishworld suggests:
The woman said it is important for an author of romantic fiction to have an evocative name, so, after much thought, I have decided to call myself Adrienne Storme.
And Victoriatheoldgoth contributes Adrienne Storme's first few lines:
Jason Westmoreland's copper-flecked eyes glanced cynically around the terrace. He was sick of Capri and longed for Wolverhampton...
ChrisNoir suggests:
At tea-time I was looking at our world map, but I couldn’t see the Falkland Islands anywhere. My mother found them; they were hidden under a crumb of fruitcake.
GermanGunner suggests:
I've changed my mind about going to London. According to The Guardian lead pollution is sending the cockneys who live there mad.
Keith6000 suggests:
Nigel says that Sharon Botts will show everything for 50p and a pound of grapes.
Kester Lovelace suggests:
A telegram! Addressed to me! The BBC? No – from my mother. 'ADRIAN STOP COMING HOME STOP.' What does she mean? 'Stop coming home'? How can I stop coming home? I live here!
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