Wednesday 24 October 2012

When Insults Had Class  
These glorious insults are from an era before the English language was reduced to 4-letter words.

 

The exchange between Churchill & Lady Astor: 
She said, "If you were my husband I'd poison your tea." 
He said, "If you were my wife, I'd drink it." 

A member of Parliament to Disraeli: "Sir, you will either die on the gallows or of some unspeakable disease."
"That depends, Sir," said Disraeli, "whether I embrace your policies or your mistress." 

"He had delusions of adequacy." - Walter Kerr 
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."  - Winston Churchill 

"I never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure." Clarence Darrow 

"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book; I'll waste no time reading it." - Moses Hadas 
 

"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it." - Mark Twain 

"
He has no enemies, but is intensely disliked by his friends.." -  Oscar Wilde 
"I am enclosing two tickets to the first night of my new play; bring a friend.... if you have one." - George Bernard Shaw to Winston Churchill"Cannot possibly attend first night, will attend second.. if there is one." - Churchill. 

"
He is a self-made man and worships his creator." - John Bright 
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing  trivial." - Irvin S. Cobb 

"In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily." - Count Talleyrand
"His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork." -  Mae West

"Some  cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go." - Oscar Wilde 
"He has Van Gogh's ear for music." - Billy Wilder 
"I've had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn't it." -  Groucho Marx.
 
 

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