Because it’s (almost) always better after 50, I’m done feeling guilty…how about you? Here’s what I’m not feeling guilty about any more…
Boycotting restaurants that have calorie counts on the menu.
- Losing my new lipstick within 24 hours after purchase.
- Buying lemons when I already have 12 in the refrigerator.
- Hoping my downhill skis are stolen when I go in for lunch.
- Staying in my pajamas all day.
- Not taking a shower until 4PM… even when I’ve exercised at 8:00AM.
- Forgetting my recycle bags about 50% of the time I go to the market.
- Not always putting the shopping cart back in the corral (I’m late; It’s raining; My knee hurts; I pray no one sees me. )
- Not ever wanting to drive 45 minutes in traffic and pay $30 for parking after driving in order to eat at an overpriced restaurant downtown.
- Sneaking my own candy into the movies.
- That my favorite date night is at home with my husband on the couch watching a Netflix movie.
- Telling the waiter, “Yes, I’d like the bread basket, please!”
- Making everyone in my airplane aisle get up when I have to pee every half hour (honestly, I tried to get an aisle seat.)
- Napping.
- Watching TV.
- Not reading the book club book (I was watching TV).
- Forgetting my password to FB, Twitter, Uber, amazon…everything
- Putting on makeup before going to the gym.
- Not always recycling.
- Chocolate three times a day.
- Getting a manicure, pedicure, facial, botox, hair color, blow out (but not all in one day, of course.)
- Taking a pill before bed so I sleep.
- Not cooking dinner.
- Being a slob.
- Hating winter, and this one in particular.
- Having a cocktail with dinner (or for dinner.)
- Looking tired when I AM tired.
- Not wanting to drive at night.
- Needing my readers to see the directions on the face cream
- Needing to lose 10 pounds.
- Taking a few days off from exercise.
- Not going to that party I really should go to but REALLY don’t want to go to.
- Acting like Larry David.
- Not calling my mother when I get home (but only because she is dead.)
- Losing 13 hours by bingeing on the latest Netflix or Amazon Prime TV show.
- Drinking 5 cups of coffee before noon.
- Retail therapy.
- Farting.
- Snoring.
- Paying $20 for a seat and popcorn at the luxury movie theatre.
- Making lists that include completed tasks, just for the pure enjoyment of crossing stuff off.
- Vacationing without the kids.
- Forgetting my kids’ phone numbers (thank you, speed dial…)
- Being happy I no longer have to get home for the dog.
- Being happy I no longer have to get home to carpool the kids.
- Hating kale.
- Being disorganized.
- Loving peanut butter ice cream.
- Having so much open on my computer that everyone who looks at it comments on it.
- Not being able to operate the TV by myself.
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