yermatty
I used to pray not to be gay.
Each night I’d plead.
Please.
God, please.
Change me.
I folded myself into whispers.
Bargained with the dark.
Promised obedience.
Silence.
To be smaller.
Just make me like everyone else.
But nothing shifted. I stayed the same.
Sometimes I look at my life now
and I think—
oh.
this was the miracle.
Child, hush now.
You weren’t askin
You were asking to survive.
And somehow,
against everything,
you did.
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