Living In The Moment

How Dogs Can Help You Stay Present

From The Magazine

(c) LIFE+DOG. Feature Story by Dani DiPirro.

All Photos by Fetching Images

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As most dog lovers know, our canine companions seem to have very little trouble existing in the present moment (unless, of course, they’ve heard the promise of a treat). Generally they focus fiercely on the now—investigating their surroundings, assessing the status of their fellow humans and dogs, feeling so utterly worry-free that they fall asleep in the middle of a crowded living room. When it comes to living in the now, dogs have it down—and there’s a lot we can learn from our present-moment focused pups.
Over the past seven years I’ve been learning about living in the moment from one special pup: my dog, Bella. This little eight-pound bundle of personality and spunk has proved to be the greatest role model when it comes to looking for live-in-the-moment inspiration. Every single day I learn from her how important it is to live in the now. Here are some of the wise lessons Bella has taught me.
Do less every day. Bella doesn't overwhelm her schedule with to-do lists and appointments and activities. She knows how to take it easy. Most dogs spend their day relaxing and playing. Many of us would love to play and rest all day long, but since that's not an option, we’ll have to put Bella’s advice into a context that works for humans. Though we can’t all quit our jobs and lie around all day in relaxing “Bella-style,” we can still take inspiration from our four-legged family members and just do less. Rather than cramming our days full of things to do, we can start spending more time living in the moments we’re experiencing right now.
Focus on right now. Never once I have noticed Bella fretting about the past or panicking about the future. (Okay, I have seen her excitedly anticipate a treat, but that’s about as future-focused as Bella gets.) Most of the time our dogs focus on the here and now. What catches the attention of a curious canine is whatever is happening to him right in that particular moment. Unlike their human counterparts, dogs don’t let the past or the present bog them down. Take a look around you right now. Pause your worries and wondering and ask yourself: “What’s actually happening right now?”
Experience more joy. There's no joy quite like that of Bella with a new toy. It doesn't matter what it is, if you give her something new and call it "new toy" that tail is wagging and she's all over it, pawing it and biting it and flipping it up in the air with excitement. It could be a piece of cloth and she wouldn’t be any less ecstatic. That’s the thing about our dogs: when they’re happy, they’re happy. They don’t let worries or regret or frustrations of any kind hold them back from their happiness. They allow themselves—unlike so many of us—to be 100% happy. We all should take a lesson from the dogs in our lives and start fully embracing the joyful moments in our lives.
Worry less often. From what I’ve seen, Bella doesn't worry much. Sure, she gets stressed out when the FedEx delivery person comes to the door and she gets a bit of anxiety when I leave her alone for too long, but generally she's not a worrier. She doesn't worry about things that are out of her control, the way we humans usually do. Unlike dogs, we tend to fret not only about what’s yet to come but also what has already happened. How much of your time do you spend thinking about things that have already happened or have yet to happen? If you’re anything like most people, the answer is probably a lot. But dogs seem aware of something we humans don’t always grasp: worry gets us nowhere. Yes, we must be concerned with our actions, and we have to plan ahead in a way dogs don’t; but that doesn’t mean we should be bogged down in worry. Take a tip from Bella: worry less, live more.
Be open to new experiences. Curiosity isn’t just for cats. Though it might not seem like it when she's lounging on the couch like a lazy sack of fur, Bella is extremely curious. Everything she can see or smell is interesting to her. Take some time to watch a dog you know in action—especially in a new environment. Watch how completely interested they are in everything. They want to meet new people and dogs. They want to investigate their surroundings. Now think about how you act in a new environment. Most of us hesitate and hold back. Often we’re either not interested—too wrapped up in our own thoughts—or not comfortable sharing our interest with others. The next time you find yourself in a new situation, ask yourself how a dog would react. (Note: this is not an invitation to smell people, lift a leg on plants, or stick your nose in inappropriate places.)

Avoid judgments.  Dogs don't judge. They don’t judge themselves, each other, and most importantly you. Bella doesn't judge me when I make a mistake. If I oversleep and she goes out an hour later that normal, you won’t find Bella judging me, accusing me of being lazy. Instead, she focuses on what’s happening—“Yay! You’re awake! Let’s go out!”—rather than dwelling on her idea of what should have or could have been. Likewise, Bella doesn't judge herself. She accepts everything about herself for what it is and goes with it. Avoiding judgments, both of others and of ourselves, is one of the best ways to live in the moment. When we stop judging and begin accepting what is—instead of what we want things to be—we’ll find that life is much easier.
Stop complaining. It can be difficult not to complain when faced with some of life’s daily annoyances, but look at how dogs handle most situations: they deal. When Bella wants something, she strives to get it. She does what she can and then moves on if she cannot obtain it. Dogs don’t complain. If they're hot or cold or tired or hungry, they cope with it. Yes, sometimes there's a little bit of whining involved, but generally they wait patiently until things get better. In many situations, we are in the same position as a dog waiting for a treat: we want something that isn’t entirely up to us. Just as dogs do, we can get frustrated and exasperated. But when those situations arise, keep in mind the thing dogs seem to know well, the thing that keeps their present moment from turning from bad to worse: complaining gets you nowhere.
Form deep connections. Those of you who have (or have had) four-legged family members probably know this: the bond between a dog and his/her owner is one of the strongest bonds possible. The love I have for Bella is unconditional. And I’m pretty sure she loves me unconditionally too. Bella has taught me the importance of close connections when it comes to living in the moment. To enjoy the now, it’s important to be surrounded with people—and dogs!—who make the now enjoyable. Having close connections with others helps us to say focused on what’s happening in the moment. When you are with someone you really want to be with, worries fade. Just think about the last time you had a really long, hard laugh with someone you love. In that moment, you were fully present—and all because you had someone to share it with.
Don't create drama. When Bella doesn’t get the bone she’s been begging for, she doesn’t bark hurtful words or find a way to take away something I want. She isn’t malicious or mean-spirited. Dogs don’t create drama for themselves. Unfortunately, we humans often do. Whether or not we want to admit it, most people create a little bit of drama for themselves. Sometimes it's purposeful and other times it’s subconscious. Dogs don't do this. They face whatever situations they're given and they deal with them directly. Being present means accepting what is, which is something dogs do quite well. When it comes to dealing with a difficult situation, a situation in which they feel uncomfortable, they don't avoid or rationalize or blame. They don’t instigate or strive to irritate. They react only to what’s happening—and that’s something we could all benefit from doing.
Learn to be at peace. Right now Bella is looking out the window, her chin resting peacefully on her paws, blinking slowly as she nears the edge of sleep. She looks completely at peace with her life. She’s not worried about what’s going to happen this afternoon. She’s not dwelling on the details of the morning walk from which she just returned. She's in the moment, looking quite peaceful and happy. We, on the other hand, are not always so peaceful. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could find that peacefulness that dogs have when they are just on the edge of sleep? We can, but we must be open to viewing life with dog-eyes. Rather than worrying about what’s to come or what could have been, we must focus on what’s happening right now. Next time you crawl into bed, strive to focus on what’s happening at that very moment—the pillow, the blankets, the darkness of the room—and strive for a dog-like state of peacefulness.
Get excited about life. Bella is always looking around her, nose in the dirt or carpet, hunting for something special. Yes, she's probably looking for the scent of other animals or a crumb left behind by the vacuum, but she has inadvertently taught me to pay attention to the little things. Even the most routine things for her are exciting. When I see that little tail wagging with joy, I can't help but be reminded that even the most mundane things, like taking a walk down the same o’ sidewalk, can be exciting. Just like Bella, we all have routines. Unlike Bella, they don’t always make our tails wag for joy. It’s easy to forget to pay attention to the things we do all the time. It’s even easier to forget to get excited about them. Think about the first time you drove to work. It was exciting; it was new. Now it’s probably so routine that you don’t even think about it. Take a tip from Bella and strive to get excited about the things you do all the time. Look at the little things you do every single day and contemplate how someone who has never done them before might find them exciting. For Bella it seems like every walk is the first walk—and there’s no reason we can’t live our lives that way as well. Imagine that every day is the first day and you’ll find yourself much more excited by life—and much more thrilled to be living in the present moment.
Our dogs are masters of something that most of us never fully do: living in the now. While it is more difficult for humans—our minds are wired just a little bit differently than our dogs’—it’s something each and every one of us is capable of doing. We will always have worries about the future. We will always have concerns from the past. But we will also always have dogs to show us that it’s worth letting go of the these worries and concerns. Dogs show us that living in the now results in a happiness, a peacefulness, that is hard to obtain any other way.
As I’m writing this, Bella has woken up and is now peering out the window, head turning with every passerby and car coming in and out of her view. Looking at her, I'm reminded of the sweet serenity that comes with not dwelling on the past or frantically preparing for the future. Like all dogs, Bella is a constant reminder of how wonderful it can be to live fully in the now.

Contributing writer Dani DiPirro lives outside of Washington, DC with her spunky and adorable Maltese, Bella. Dani is the creative force behind Positively Present, where she primarily writes about living a positive life in the present. For daily inspiration and creative musings from Dani, visit www.positivelypresent.com.